But do me a favor: Keep this blog private... for now. This one is an invitation only blog and what is posted here is meant to stay here if at all possible - at least for now. It is designed specifically for men be they single, married, priest, deacon, brother. You are among those invited by personal invitation.
You are Musicians, Doctors, Priests, Corporate Executives, Blue Collar Workers, Artists, Builders, Lawyers, Religious, Single, Truck Drivers, Firefighters, Married, Deacons, Dads, Police Officers, Soldiers, Businessmen, Young Adults, Grandfathers, and those who ache to be dads...
My first goal is to gather your insight to help fathers who have never had 'The Talk" with their teen aged sons. Up until a couple months ago, I was freaking out about the "who-what-when-why-where-and-how-much-to-share" anxiety. As it turns out "The Talk" began when I was not planning for it to begin... and it turned out to be one really wonderful beginning of a conversation. It was very important to me to tell my (12 year old) son more than once that this conversation would last for the next 5 to 10 years and beyond.
There is no way on earth I am going to abandon him to navigate the currents of testosterone that are beginning to course through his veins. I told him that he could ask me ANY question about this subject and I would answer to the best of my ability.
Like most of you, I had maybe a thirty second window to talk with my own father about this when I was in sixth grade. The window was open, I was too uneasy to ask the questions I had and then the window was closed. My guess is that it was more than he was given by his father.
Anyone else out there want to join me in providing ideas, answers, situations, wisdom, advice, stories, prayers, etc to persuade a million men out there to become anchors for their sons (and daughters) at a critical stage of growth in this pivotal time in the history of our culture?
Eventually some of what we share will be offered to single moms and those teen aged boys who have no father to talk with about their changing bodies. They are badly in need of advice and reassurance as they face the whirlwind of colliding opinions our culture is shoving at them regarding what it means to be a man in this day and age.
Here's a secret: Nothing has changed in that regard over the past few thousand years. Our culture is just going through an identity crisis and wants our children to share in the confusion. God wants to give our children peace and direction.
This will probably be a book. You men know we need it.
Men need a boost to help them talk to their sons about faith formation, finance, holy matrimony, purity, sexual development, virtue, sacrifice, - all things pertaining to growing toward authentic manhood.
You are invited to participate. Please keep your e-mail address private and sign up with a fake name so we can get right to the heart of issues more quickly.
Men have been sharing bits of wisdom and tragedy with me for the last twenty years. Each time I hear a new story I am more convinced a blog like this can do a great service. Every time a man tells me he was never told a thing about reproduction from his father - I am more determined to get this blog going.
I mean - come on! We get an entire semester course on driver's training right? What is with this five minute talk on the reproductive drive? Not okay.
When you post - please give your approximate age (late 40s, early 50s) and the state you were born in or where you live. You are among the first one hundred invitations sent out.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Okay men, here are my first two questions for you.
1) How did you learn about the facts of life?
2) How do you wish you would have learned?
Thanks for stopping by - now sign in with your fake name and start typing!
Remember I will review and edit comments if needed - I need to retain control because I am a controlling kind of guy - but also to ensure this discussion does not get too off base.
If you have e-mail addresseses of men you would like me to invite - put 'em in an e-mail and send it to me at holyfamilynow@mac.com
1 comment:
I'm closer to 60 than 50 and was born and raised in a small town in the "Bible Belt" of eastern Kansas.
My Dad never had the "talk" with me, and truth be known I most likely wouldn't have listened any way.
In our house Dad deferred most decissions by saying "go ask your mother". This really didn't work very well for me on this particular topic. When pressing Dad with a question the typical response was an emphatic "DON'T YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT IT".
After getting this response multiple times I was sure Dad just didn't know the answer. When I asked my brother (2 years older) the response was more along the lines of "GET AWAY FROM ME YOU PERVERT!!" Still I couldn't bring myself to ask Mom.
Thought I'd get some straight answers in junior high health class. This turned out to be more about the "mechanics" of the act which by this time I had pretty much discovered by and with myself. The questions I had remained unanswered due in large part to my reluctance to ask Ms. Faulkner who was then about the age I am now.
I'm not sure how I wish I had learned. The hardest lesson I learned was that women are not toys for my personal pleasure.
Thankfully I didn't become a father until my wife informed me I was ready. Thankfully too, had my daughter come to me with her questions on the topic I would have informed her to "go ask you mother" because I'd have no idea how to answer.
Post a Comment